Saying that I’m not a morning person is like saying Mount Everest is a ‘large hill.’ I’ve heard the pitch before – it’s the best part of the day, it’s  good for your metabolism to be awake early, and probably some other reasons I don’t care about. It’s not that I haven’t tried, I was even one of those self-righteous morning people for about 20 seconds before I remembered how awesome my bed is at 5am. But, if you’re still determined to torture yourself and wade through lycra clad runners on your way to get a coffee, then here are my 4 top tips for hacking your morning.

1. Get Goin’!

Leave the alarm out of reach so you have to get up, this avoids the 20x snooze scenario. There’s an alarm clock called the Rocket Launch which shoots a rocket at a random angle in your room and then the alarm starts and won’t stop until you find and return the rocket. Sounds funny huh? Not at stupid-o’clock in the morning it’s not. And get thinking the night before – planning an awesome, tasty breakfast is a great way to encourage your sleep deprived carcass to make it’s way to the kitchen. Also, put some music on and get moving – leave the TV alone.

2.For Lack Of A Better Title – ARRAAAGGHH

Ice baths and cold showers are the bastion of athletes and extreme dieters alike. They’re also an awesome way to go from lethargic and dopey to wide awake and furiously angry at the idiot who suggested this was a good idea. If you’d like to lodge a complaint, I’ll handle it as a reasonable hour – PM.

3. Stretch It Out

Have a yoga mat sitting on the floor next to your bed, then follow these simple instructions –

1. Wake

2. Roll toward mat

3. Fall onto mat

4. Begin yoga

If you haven’t done yoga before, Google ‘sun salutations.’ As a yoga fan I can honestly say it gives me more energy than an espresso…which I also have a few minutes later.

4. Roll Over, Go Back To Sleep

Sleep deprivation can literally kill you, so do yourself a favour. Go back to sleep and, before you drift off, spare a thought for morning people – they’re all clearly insane.