Meetings were invented based on the fallacy that, ‘If we’re talking about work, we must be working.’
Sometimes there are mints and the manager always has a notepad with a list and a coffee that he, ‘really needs because it’s been such a big day.’ Then, the meeting begins.
‘What have you been doing?’ asks the manager.
‘Well my community engagement numbers are up,’ you respond.
‘We should get something that goes viral.’
You resist the temptation to suggestion Ebola. ’Good thinking.’
Then there’s a powerpoint, a story about when they did our job and an anecdote that serves no relevance in reality but takes up another five minutes nonetheless. Then you walk towards the door and on the way you get asked something personal like how your family is or where you got your shoes (they’re lovely) and then a handshake and, ‘Keep up the good work!’
Then there’s a few moments of staring at the wall, wondering what just happened – and is this really the type of company you want to be working for?
Meetings no longer serve any relevance to the way businesses are aspiring to be run and in many cases they’re the thing holding back a more mobile and agile workforce. Decisions should be collaborative and made on the run as required – not at structured times. But the deeper issue is that technology is evolving and businesses are hiring people with skill-sets that managers don’t understand and so they want to sit down and make sure they know what’s going on – even though it’s essentially being completed in a language they don’t understand. Programmers and social media community managers and web copywriters get annoyed explaining everything they are doing and inevitably they move on and less talented people are hired in order to make the managers feel like they’re just as smart as they hoped they were. A culture of average performers ensues and top notch players are never seen again. All because of stupid meetings about nothing.